Friday, November 1, 2013

Harvest Happiness



Your happiness is an internal happening. Happiness is a feeling being transmitted through your senses in order that it may be expressed outwardly. The way you express yourself on the outside influences how others respond to you.


Walk into a room and notice the “mood” of the room. What is happening inside of us is always expressed on the outside. We may carry ourselves heavily when we feel burdened; we may bounce as we walk when we are truly ecstatic.  We wear worry lines and frowns and laugh lines.


If we seek what is true, we realize that our level of happiness is influencing how we participate in the world around us. We influence the world around us and those who operate in that world through communication. 


Wearing our emotions on our bodies is one way we communicate. How we speak to others is another. The feedback we get is a third way of communicating. BUT, in my way of thinking, the most important form of communication is how our minds translate experiences, feelings and beliefs to us.


For most of us, our internal dialog is silently running in the background and is secretly affecting how we view our day. By tapping into our minds, we can choose to substitute one unfruitful thought for another, more beneficial thought.



Last month, I challenged everyone to play a game of Conversation Tag: to have a conversation each day with someone new and to observe their responses and your reactions.

Now I invite you to share what effect this exercise in communication had/has on you: 


  •   Are you more aware of auto responses? “Hi, Can I help you?” “Fine, and you?”

  •   How often do you anticipate someone’s reactions?   Or do you experience their reactions as they occur?

  •   Do you feel more comfortable connecting with strangers now?

  •   How has this exercise changed communication with those familiar to you?



         "Prepare your mind to receive the best that life has to offer."
            Ernest Holmes

**How do you feel about communication in today’s world?

**Do we connect with those around us each day or are we losing at the “game” of communication?

Second weekof November

The next stage of this game is to now pay attention to how you talk to yourself. What conversations do you have in your head?
  •  Are they full of positive feedback and encouragement?
  •  Do you find that you admonish yourself for forgetting or not doing something?
  •  Are your internal conversations useful in moving you toward a goal, dealing with a difficult situation?
  •  When you listen to the chatter in your mind, is it harmful? Negative? Full of doubt? Or is it light, thoughtful, empowering, and supportive?



         "He is able who thinks he is able.” Buddha

Thursday, October 24, 2013

Conversation Tag-Play The Game!



Trying something different can help you break out of an old pattern and can have a positive effect not only on you, but the person you engage with in conversation. Do you remember the last time you were struggling through the day and someone started a conversation with you that changed your mood?  
Become an influencer through conversation!

Objective: To have at least one conversation with someone new each day for a month.

Rules: 
  •  You must smile and initiate the conversation. 
  •  If the person you choose as your conversation partner chooses not to play, give them a big smile and choose a new partner.
  •  Think of new ways to start the conversation other than, “How are you?”  
  •  At least 5 out of 7 conversations must be with a stranger or someone you very seldom   talk with, like  someone in another department at work or a neighbor you seldom run into.           
  •  One point for each conversation you attempt. Two points if the person responds. 
     Five points for making them smile. 
     Ten points for initiating a conversation with someone you usually avoid.

How to play:
The game begins with your first opportunity to speak with a stranger or someone with whom you usually do not talk. You can choose specific times each day to focus on playing, or you can play all day long. There are three levels of experience: novice, intermediate and expert.
-Novice: Asks a question which demands a safe response, such as “Where are the restrooms?”
-Intermediate: Starts a conversation by making a personal observation,” That is a unique tie. I’ve never seen one with actual feathers on it!”
-Expert: Engages the person in an exchange for a minute or more. “You are always cheerful when I come in here at lunch. What’s your secret?” “If you were to sell your secret to me, how much would you charge?”
                                    
  Communication works for those who work at it. John Powell
                                                                                               
Each day after you have a conversation with someone new, make a note on how they responded. Were they eager to “play”? Did you feel like you came from Mars (or Venus)? Did you leave them smiling? How did the “game” affect you?

The Final Challenge:
Encourage your family, friends and co-workers to “play” as well. Make a mental note about how you feel during this process. See how many times you notice yourself on a cell phone ignoring those around you, like the person serving you your meal, ringing your purchase or trying to listen to a movie, speech, etc. Make it a conscious effort every day to connect with someone new around you. We all need human contact in our lives. Technology sometimes robs us (if we let it) of opportunities to enrich that contact. Take the challenge and connect with someone!



Support:
In order to support your efforts in playing Conversation Tag, here are some suggested ways to begin a conversation with someone new to you:

  1. Smile and say, “Nice to see you!”
  2. “How are you enjoying this weather?”
  3. Comment on their pleasant demeanor, brightly colored shirt, their kindness towards someone nearby that you may have observed.
  4. Thank them for smiling at you.
  5. Tell them something you appreciate about them, such as speedy service at the drive thru during lunch or their suggestion on how to save money at the office supply store.
  6. Say something to help turn around a negative experience, such as “It’s a good thing that person took the parking space you were waiting for…that one is reserved for people having a bad hair day.”
  7. While waiting in a long line, ask someone next to you, “What would you think of them turning on a sprinkler to keep us cool?”
  8. If you work somewhere (UPS, FedEx, store associate) that you would require someone’s signature, instead of “Sign Here” say, “We’re collecting autographs of important people and I noticed we don’t yet have yours.”
  9. Break the ice at a meeting by asking someone what their favorite vacation spot is and why.
  10. Ask someone what game show they would participate in and why.

If not, try one of the above conversation starters on yourself; the funnier or more creative, the better!
           
          

Speak well: others might be listening!

Monday, August 12, 2013

The Evolution of Money Mindset

The End of The Money Trap
by Renee Canali





Pennies, pennies

in a little pig.

Collect enough pennies

and you can live BIG.

 

Working, Working-

Money for my time.

Out of every dollar

it seems I keep a dime.

 

Struggle, struggle

to bring more money in.

The hours are getting longer

and my patience wearing thin.

 

Abundance, abundance-

Responsibility is mine to take.

Receive money for the value

Of the impact I can make.

 

Perception, perception

of what I believe is true,

changes by taking action

in what I think, say and do.

Thursday, August 8, 2013

How Does Money Hold You Hostage?


Think •  Value •  Desire  • Risk • Responsibility • Focus • Cause • Effect • Action  
 

In order to succeed, your desire for success must be greater than your fear of failure. Bill Cosby 

 
It's August! At the end of July we celebrated my son's last birthday of his second decade.


I recall many challenges of raising kids. I also remember that as my kids grew, so did I. July gave me plenty of growth opportunities!
 

For instance, did you get an email from me with just a header and a footer? Maybe you received 2 of the same emails. OR, maybe your email is still trying to find its way to you. My email service and my website service have been plagued with technical oddities- please join me in a hardy laugh! I look forward to each morning when I can discover the newest of technology glitches and what effect it can have without anyone noticing!  

 
Now, as an entrepreneur and business owner, I face challenges in running a business and this month has really been filled with challenges. Entrepreneurial minded women face many challenges; that is part of creating success.

 
However, it is very debilitating when the decisions you make about your business endeavors and your personal enjoyment revolve around money. Making decisions based on the cost of an item, activity or service is disempowering.
 

When your day is filled with decisions made from a disempowering place, the amount of confusion and frustration you encounter increases. And you know how much of a struggle it is to move forward without clarity and focus when you are under this type of stress.

 
It is critical for you to operate from a place of clear and focused action. You must know what you want in order to claim what you most desire. Instead of making decisions based in fear about what might happen, successful individuals make decisions from the perspective of what value will be added by choosing one option over another.


Focusing on taking the right action is easier when you operate from this place of power.

 
There are 4 lessons below that illustrate how to use your Money Mindset Assessment score as a guide to a richer, more desire-centric life.
* If you haven't taken the Money Mindset Assessment, you can find it here:
 
______________________________________________________________

  Money Lessons For A Desire-Centric Life

The Money Mindset Assessment gives you a picture of the beliefs you have about money and the effects of Money in your life.

Lesson1 Lower scores only indicate the beliefs you have which can be modified for a more powerful mastery of money. Lower scores indicate that money is more in control of your results than you are.

You may be operating from a false sense of security by making decisions based on how much something costs PRIOR TO determining the worth– or value – that expense would add to your life.

At about 12 or thirteen I was curious about why my mom, a widow with 5 kids at home and living on survivor’s benefits, would not use coupons at the grocery store. I spent time cutting coupons out of Reader’s Digest and organizing them by what I wanted her to buy. She never used them.

I asked her why she wouldn’t use them and she said she believed it was a sign of dependence. Now, as a Miracle of Money Coach trained by David Neagle, I understand that using coupons and buying solely based on a discount enslaves you. I’ll tell you how in a minute.  

Lesson 2 Lower scores also indicate how you may view risk and how willing you are to take risks. Not all risks are the same. People with higher assessment scores are more apt to take calculated risks.
 
Calculated risks are those decisions which are made once you estimate the probability of failure versus the expected reward. In other words, understanding the value added opposed to the risk of not achieving a desirable result.

If you needed surgery in order to save your life, you would do almost anything to pay for the surgery. You would take risks that were uncomfortable in hopes that the outcome would allow you more life. But would you spend money on a housekeeper if it would allow you to have more time to spend with a dying family member?  

There is no right or wrong answer here. The reasoning-or thinking-behind the answer is what is important.

 Lesson 3 Median scores (between 16-24) reflect your awareness is increasing. You notice in some areas of your life that you are clearer about which actions and behaviors result in positive and successful experiences.

This indicates those areas where you accept more responsibility for the results. Better and more consistent results indicate where in your life you accept more responsibility.   

When the results you are getting are in opposition to your desires, you get clues that your thinking is out of alignment with your desires. These clues can be as subtle as minor illnesses and unexpected bills or as apparent as leaking plumbing and job loss.   

Developing mastery in your money mindset requires awareness of how you make decisions. This requires guidance and support.

Lesson 4  Higher scores indicate that a different way of thinking is evolving.

This different way of thinking is the difference between living a life centered around lack, not enough and settling for what you believe you can have AND a desire-centric life of fearless action, personal empowerment and responsibility for your results.

When you are in alignment with your desires you operate from a place of confidence, power and fearlessness. You will experience hesitation at times; and you move through it using universal principles. You know that if you want a different effect, you must cause that effect or result.
 
This is how my mother focused her energy. Having lived with lack and dependence most of her life, she determined she was the only one who could get herself out. In order to move forward, she had to claim independence.


You learn to be decisive. Confusion, indecision and frustration are indicators that you may have conflicting beliefs and therefore are not truly making a decision.

If you are ready to begin making decisions that support your desires, Master Your Money Monsters   is a great way to start. Experience what true freedom is- the ability to control your results and master your mindset.
 
How you make decisions about money is a reflection of how you approach every area of your life.

If you want to live a more balanced life and leave confusion and frustration behind, click here for details.